Welcome to Happy Snowflake Dance!

It's my experiment in joyful, marrow-sucking living.
Inspired by George Santayana's poem,
There May Be Chaos Still Around the World

" They threat in vain; the whirlwind cannot awe
A happy snow-flake dancing in the flaw. "


My Mission: a daily journey into Openness.

I hope you'll come along!

Sunday, November 15, 2020

Sunday at Molly’s


 It’s Sunday afternoon in mid-November.  I’m enjoying people watching at my favorite local sidewalk cafe in Upland, Molly’s Souper.  Molly, the previous owner (she just sold the restaurant right before COVID) whom I’ve always found delightful, is also tuning in to Eckhart Tolle.  

Tuesdays with Eckhart Tolle’s Being the Light webinar have been sweet and uplifting.  Life is busy, but I’m carving out more time for being creative and also for being present.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be fully, spiritually conscious at all times? And yet, I’m not.  But I find that I catch myself more quickly when I slip into judgmental unconsciousness or being closed.  I’m also fully accepting of this fact that life is messy, relationships are messy, and we don’t have to be perfect.  Well, let’s face it: we absolutely cannot be perfect.  But we’ve never been called to perfection.  We have been called to live in peace, to be peace, to walk in light and to be light.  

So on this precious Sunday afternoon at my favorite hangout, I’m soaking in the dappled sunlight, glimpses of a sweet puppy at the next table over (only 10 weeks old), street noises, hushed conversations, loud motorcycles, people walking in the soft sunshine, and the gentle strength of several ancient trees lining the streets.  

Life is sweet when we allow ourselves to be open to the universe, to whatever is, to this moment.  When we turn off the thoughts about yesterday or tomorrow, when we stop listening to fear and judgment, we find that love is there.  It is in us.  It is all around us.  Love flows from us, through us, into us.  

Fear leads to anger, hatred, judgment, and so many other negative emotions and actions.  It keeps us closed. 

But “perfect love casts out all fear.”  Fear cannot stand in the presence of real love, unconditional love.  We experience that kind of love when we see that we are part of the great cosmic dance, not separate from it, from God, or from “others”.  We are interconnected.  That is how we can love our neighbors, our planet, other creatures, other people, and our enemies as ourselves...because we recognize that “they” are “us”.  We are part of the whole.  

Now, I’m headed home to be with family.  I hope I can remember this and hang on to inner peace....

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

Being the Light with Tolle


 It’s been a busy month.  Deadlines for music productions and video productions for online church.

I’ve been enjoying creating new music, such as it is.  I’m still learning how to play the piano... well, more like improvise.  I just find joy in finding new sounds and exploring with music.  

I’ve just started the new Tolle webinar, Being the Light.   

Go to EckhartTolle.com for more info.  This 8 week series is lovely and filled with gracious compassion. 

It’s a sweet, lovely meditation each week.  It’s more like a gentle conversation which makes me want to wake up! To be able to face external circumstances from a deeper place of being.  

So many thoughts to record... and yet, they are just thoughts.... forms, temporary... Like Tolle, I’ve been contemplating “being light”.  I finally get what Jesus was saying about us being salt and light. 

I’ll share more on these ideas in future blogs.  But I’ve been meditating on what Tolle mentioned last week.  3 things.  Jesus said, 1.  He is the light of the world. 2 WE are the light of the world.  In fact, he pointed out that our essential nature IS LIGHT.  “A city set on a hill cannot be hidden”.  This isn’t just about doing, but about being. 3.  The first thing God spoke into existence was light.    We come from light (Formlessness) and we return to light.  

But even as we embrace new ideas, we recognize that thoughts and ideas might point us toward truth, but are not ultimate truth.  Jesus said you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.  What truth?  Adopting another ideology? Adopting a set of beliefs?  No!  Jesus did not come to start a new religion or belief system.  He came to point out that we are one with God.  We always have been, but our egoic minds create a sense of separation from God, from others.  

Like all true spiritual teachers, Jesus simply helped people recognize something inside themselves which they always knew but were temporarily blinded to.  You are the light of the world! God is the great I am that I am.  He is the Tao (the truth or God) which cannot be described or limited by words or labels.  The first precept of the Tao Te Ching is that the Tao which can be described or understood is not the eternal Tao. God is beyond our puny ideologies and beliefs.  

Our sense of being-ness comes from the eternal formlessness.  This is a call to deeper being.  Many wonderful Christians will try to convince us and everyone they meet that we are all going to hell if we don’t put God in their box of beliefs.  They think God is like them.  

If we agree with them, then suddenly we are worthwhile to them.  As long as we agree with their limited, egoic worldview.  As long as we identify with their sets of beliefs, then they deem us worthy of going to heaven.  But they missed the point of everything Jesus said and taught!  Everything for them (and at times for me if I am still operating from my ego self) is about doing, earning God’s love, and nothing to do with being.  

I recently had an opportunity to help lead worship with a small group of folks in an open-air setting.  It was supposed to be socially-distanced, with masks.  I was the only person to wear a mask.  They tried to convince me to join them, but I tried to explain that I wear a mask out of love for others.  It’s not about fear for my safety.  It’s about protecting others from me, as I might potentially be an asymptomatic carrier of COVID-19.    

I tried to keep an open heart and spirit as the night went on and people shared their hearts.  I wanted to be fully present.  But as the night went on, I was saddened to see how much of the talk centered around trying to get everyone to see the world their way.  About trying to convince everyone else that they are going to hell... there was very little love, except for people whom they consider to be in their clique. 

I kept thinking of Saint Augustine’s words...Preach the gospel by all means, and use words if absolutely necessary.  These people were operating from the opposite worldview.  Heaven is not here and now or near as Jesus said.  Heaven is in a distant future.  And by all means talk people to death with your “good news” to convince them that you are “right”, and by default, they are bad or wrong.... and occasionally love people, but only if you think they measure up to your spiritual yardstick. 

And I also realize how judgmental this is on my part... and there is the paradox.  As soon as I judge others, then I am no longer salt or light.  The very thing I “accuse” these others of, losing their saltiness by depending on works, rather than  “being light”, is the very thing I am guilty of.... right? 


Monday, September 14, 2020

A prayer



Spirit, what do you want me to birth into this world of form? Not my will, but yours be done. Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth (in this world of form) as it is in heaven (the formless now).

Want to know your purpose? I do. As I still myself, I ask, "Holy Spirit, bring out your purpose which you put in me even before this world's foundations were laid. And help me to be quiet enough, still enough to sense your will."



Sunday, September 13, 2020

The Secret of Happiness is a misnomer and other things...


Have  two weeks already passed? What can I say about the last two weeks?  They are gone.  Life is happening!  Life is NOW, only now.  Life is not lived in the past or in the future.  It is only ever NOW, this moment.  That still blows my mind.  To think that I’ve spent most of my life either regretting the past or looking to some imaginary future, which never comes.  The ONLY moment that has ever existed or exists or will exist is Now, continuously unfolding.  NOW.  If I think of the past, I am thinking of it in the now.  If I imagine the future, I am planning or imagining it when?  In the now.  

Tolle reminds us in The Secret of Happiness that we can learn a spiritual lesson even in a British Pub.  He points to the sign above the bar which claims: FREE BEER Tomorrow.  “Woo hoo!” We think.  Free Beer!  I’m coming back tomorrow.  But if you return the next day and demand your free beer, the pub owner will simply point you back to the sign and say, “it says ‘Free Beer TOMORROW’.  Today is today.”   Jesus said it like this, “Tomorrow never comes”.  When he taught his disciples to pray, he told them to ask only for what they needed today, now.  “Give us today our daily bread.”  “Do not worry about tomorrow, what you will eat or drink or what you will wear...”. Why?  Because tomorrow never comes.  The only time that actually exists is now, this moment, the present.  

I’ve been busy with home schooling, tutoring, producing videos for online church, recording vocals, and making music with not only the Saint Mark’s Praise Band, but also with a fantastic group of musicians (mostly retired) who are calling themselves, “The Second Act”.  I’m loving every minute as I learn to accept what is in this moment, let go of all judgments, and be at peace with what is.  As I do, I am able to let go of judging myself and others, even when we do act out of “ego” or “unconscious patterns of behavior and mental patterns or emotional pain-bodies” as Tolle would call them.  

I am more at peace than I have ever been in my life, as I “practice presence” or get in touch with the Spirit who is at work in me.  My attachments to ideas, belief systems, political positions, thoughts, even the way I  think “things should be done” are fading away...  That’s not to say that I have completely learned to stop reacting or defending my sense of self at all times.  Sometimes I still react to others.  But I am able to recognize those “slip ups” of reacting and defending my ego self more quickly.  I find most of those come from my interactions with family...after all, who is most efficient at “pushing our buttons” than the people we are closest to?

As I go for my evening “Stroll with Tolle”, as I call my nightly reflective walk, I listen to Eckhart reading one of his books or listen to one of his many talks.  I take the time to reflect back on my day’s interactions.  I do this as a teaching tool, not as a way to beat myself up for “failures” or to rehash the past or even to pat myself on the back, that would just be another exercise in boosting my ego-self.  I simply ask myself: “Where was I irritated or upset or reactive?  Why do I disturb myself?  Is it worth getting irritated over little things?  And if I reacted to someone else’s speech, mental position, or ideas, was I reacting or defending my ego self?  That is just a false sense of self.  The real me is eternal, spirit, presence.  Now is the only moment. Can I be present now?  Can I let go of this day’s events or what someone else said or did? Of yesterday?  Am I focused on tomorrow?  Or the next moment or some imaginary interaction with someone else? Can I see Christ in everyone and everything? That is my true calling.  To embrace NOW and to see Christ in all.”

And as I practice living now, letting go of past failures, successes, or moments, and future ambitions, I begin to feel peace, overwhelming love, joy, and creativity.  I feel the oneness with all of creation, as the Holy Spirit reveals life in me.

In the past two weeks, I’ve read and listened to Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now, Stillness Speaks (again and again), Practicing the Power of Now, and The Secret of Happiness- Discovering the Source of Contentment, Peace, and Joy.   I’m listening to The Secret of Happiness for the second time on Audible.  This is POWERFUL, simple, yet elegant.  If you are looking for entertainment and constantly need bells and whistles, you won’t get it.  You’ll say, “Oh, he is too boring.  He speaks too calmly.  I’m so bored.”  If you are really ready to find peace, you’ll stick with it.  He is humorous, he is kind, he has a very gentle way of speaking the truth.  But if you need to be entertained at all times, then you are not ready to break out of your mind set, your mind-made self.  And that’s okay.  When you are ready to be broken open and see reality now, you’ll find your way back to these very simple ways of being in the world. 

I suppose if I could summarize what Tolle is simply communicating: I would say (and I recognize that these are just words, forms, temporary pointers, possibly even just mental positions- which Tolle would might not endorse)...but I would say to my friends who are suffering right now...and we all know people who are suffering.  I would ask:

1.  TIME: Can you be present NOW?  Can you accept that time is an illusion, a form, a temporary structure which, yes, we find helpful for practical things like setting appointments, but which really only ever exists NOW?

2.  SPIRIT: Can you accept that there is more to you than just your circumstances or your thoughts or your self-image or personality or career or possessions?  I think most people would agree that they are much more than those “things”.  Can you sense that who you really are is so much more, something eternal.  Tolle calls it Presence, Stillness, Space, the space between words, Spacious Acceptance, Consciousness, Awareness, Life Itself, Being...  there are many words or forms to point to this aspect of ourselves.  Some call it spirit, some call it Christ in us, some call it Soul.  Whatever word or phrase resonates with you, can you accept (not just mentally), but can you feel that there is something way bigger than your “little self” or egoic self to you?  You may have noticed that your egoic self is that part of you which is almost always complaining or whining or irritated or griping about someone or something...  It is never satisfied for long.  It always needs more.  It always needs something else to fulfill it, to make it feel complete. For me, the word “being” starts to get at this eternal, formless self.  This is the “I am that I am” within you...something (not really a thing) which defies definition.  Remember, when God revealed himself to Moses, he/she said, “I am that I am”, you can’t name me, I am more than a name, I am, you can’t put me in a box or try to make me in YOUR image, I am formless, beyond words.  And when he appeared to the Israelites, he took a formless form (smoke and fire), lest they try to worship images of “him”.

3.  LETTING GO of ATTACHMENTS:  once we understand, and this not just with words or as a mental exercise, but once we sense that our egoic self is just a temporary form, not meant to last forever, even illusory in some ways, we find that letting go of “who we are”, “dying to self” is so much easier.  When we can accept what IS in this moment, we no longer need to fight against what is.  This situation is what it is.  It is not an attack on me personally.  Can I be at peace with what is?  Can I be non-reactive? If we need to change something in this moment, we are the change that we want to see.  If we want to see peace in the world, we ARE the peace.  Instead, when we come from a place of Conscious Awareness, or being led by the Holy Spirit, we no longer bring judgments to our situations or the people we are interacting with.  It changes the way we interact with everyone and everything. When we enter into NOW, allowing the spirit in us to rise up, quieting the monkey brain or constant chatter of thought, we are able to address our situations and others from a place of peace, of non-judgment, of non-reaction. 

 Now that we “see” that psychological Time (Tolle’s term for the past and the imagined future) is illusory, that our sense of egoic-self is illusory, there is no more need to defend a mental position, a sense of who I thought I was, a political position, a belief system, roles which I have held, judgments, wants, likes, dislikes, desires, goals, dreams, possessions, things to which I have attached my sense of identity... None of those things are bad.  Dreams and goals can be very useful tools.  But when I attach my sense of identity or selfhood to those things which are only temporary, I confuse who I am with what I do.  

Tolle might call this the balance between HUMAN BEING.  HUMAN is the DOING part, the part in which I have lived most of my life, the madness of the HUMAN conditioning of the mind with all its desires and ideas, mental patterns, social structures, emotional reactions, thoughts, suffering, the part which I often confuse as my real self.  Then there is the BEING part, which is eternal, formless, Spirit, not defined by thought, idea, form, concepts, or beliefs, but recognized as joy, peace, creativity, and abundant life.  The questions I wish I could ask my friends whom I see suffering are: Can you let go of your preconceived ideas of your life and your situation long enough to feel the presence of God in this moment?  And be at peace with what is now?  Can you let go of your list of “how things should be or not be” long enough to allow peace to well up inside you? 

The call of Christ was for humanity to be reconciled to wholeness again, to be restored to God, to be reunited with God is to be WHOLE.  The original sin was the knowledge of good and evil, right?  With it came this sense of “SELF” as separate from God.  Adam and Eve suddenly knew that they were naked, they were self-conscious.  What is hell?  When I grew up, hell was defined as separation from God.  We’ve been living our entire lives in hell, thinking that we were separated from him.  But Jesus came to show that we are in Christ.  This is not just a mental check list.  Believe that there is a God?  Check. Believe in your head that Jesus lived and showed the way to live and die? Check.  Believe that he is fully human and fully God?  Check.  Okay, now I’m going to heaven.  NOPE!  In fact, Jesus said the kingdom of heaven is here now.  Heaven is not in some distant future.  Heaven is not far away, up there somewhere.  Heaven is here now.  You just have to open your spirit to “see” it, to be whole in God again.

Jesus did not come to earth to START A NEW RELIGION!  Or even an exclusive, Members-only club.  He came that we might see that EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE IS HELD TOGETHER IN HIS BEING, that Christ is and always has been in ALL and through all.  When we stop being blinded by the forms we see in front of us, be it in the form of an irritating person or the form of a life circumstance, and we see that Christ is also in that person (maybe hidden behind ego) or that situation (because everything in the universe also has God in it), then we begin to get why Jesus said “Love your neighbor as yourself”. Because you are your neighbor.  Your neighbor is part of you.  What you do to others, you do to yourself.  You are not separate.  This is why Jesus said to love your enemy.  Why?  Because your enemy is you.  You are your enemy.  This is why Jesus could die to self, not defend himself before Pilate or the Sanhedrin.  Why?  Because he had already let go of his attachment to this temporary form (his body, his ego) years before!   When we see that this physical universe is only a shadow of the eternal, infinite, formless, indescribable reality, we realize that we are not at war with people or even ideas or even beliefs or situations.  This world will pass away.  

Now we understand what Paul was starting to get at in Ephesians 6-  The weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God.  We do not fight against flesh and blood.  In fact, we don’t fight.  But that’s another chapter for Tolle to explain.  The person in front of you is not your enemy.  The situation you are in is not your enemy.  It is as it is.  Seeing Christ even in the most hateful person, knowing that “they know not what they do”, knowing that they are controlled by the mind, mental patterns, emotional pain-bodies, they have not awakened to “Christ in us- the hope of glory”, means there is nothing to forgive.  True forgiveness comes when I recognize that others just have not awakened to Christ yet, but that Christ is in there, too.  Some never will awaken until they die.  But in the end, every knee will bow, every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is LORD (Yahweh), the I am that I am, the formless, eternal Creator God, in whose being the entire universe is sustained and held together (Hebrews 1-2). 

Our job as followers of Christ is to find the Christ in everyone and everything.  To not be put off by the temporary forms in front of us.  You know that YOU are not really your body or your possessions or even your career or status or lack of status.  You are not the labels you or others put on yourself.  YOU know that you are MORE, so much more.  YOU know that you are spirit temporarily clothed in the form of a physical body.  Guess what?  So is everyone else.  Yep, even the most despicable person you can think of.

When we begin to realize this (and again, this goes beyond words or ideas), when we begin to move in spirit or “be led by the Spirit”, this changes how we are in the world.  It changes who we are in the world. It changes everything.  The world is not a problem to be fixed.  People are not problems to be fixed.  I am not a problem to be fixed.  You are not a problem to be fixed.  Oh, but I need to change so much about myself, you say.  I’m not the person I want to be.  I need more time!  It seems like that, doesn’t it?  But now that we know that time is illusory, and NOW is the only time that actually ever exists.  We don’t have time.  Some imagined better me in the future does not exist.  Instead of avoiding this moment, I now embrace this moment.  And when I am still, shushing the mind with its myriad thoughts, I can feel spirit rising up, bubbling up...joy, peace, beauty, life, creativity begin to overflow.  Now when I do something, it is from a place of peace in Christ.  And I see Christ in others.  

As C.S. Lewis said, we see the “weight of glory” in others.  Lewis challenged us in his famous sermon.  If we could see the glory that God put in all of us (yes, even THAT guy) from the very beginning of the world, the glory that has always been there, but we were too blinded by our thoughts and mental ruts to see, if we could see others as Christ sees them, clothed in glory, we would be tempted to bow down and worship them as gods, like the stories in the Old Testament of when angelic visitors interacted with humans...This is the way Jesus showed us.  This is how he could claim to be the way, the truth, and the life.  And his prayer for us?  That we would be one, even as he and the Father are one.  That we would see that “others” don’t exist, but that we would see our connection to all, to God.  This is what it means to “be in Christ” or to “live by the spirit” as we claim to do.  This is not about some mental check list of beliefs, but a radically different way to BE in the world.  To be in Christ, is to be whole in God, to KNOW in your spirit, not just in your head that you are Christ’s and Christ is in God, and Christ is God.  

THIS is the ministry of reconciliation, not convincing people that they are bad and need to believe all the right things (and by default, none of the “wrong things”) to get into heaven, but to see Christ in all and through all, to see that our wholeness comes when we let go of the self-made identities and reconnect with the still, small voice that is already in us, calling us to wholeness in Christ.  Reconciliation to God happens and wholeness is restored when people are able to quiet their mind-made selves long enough to feel the connection with God once again.  Remember, in Adam (an archetypal figure) sin came into the world, in other words separation from God, but this separation was man-made, a mental construct for this world of forms, a temporary world in which words and labels have a practical function, but which convince us that we are separated from God.  

 God has never left us.  David once wrote Psalm 139-

Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths (some translate this as hell), you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.
”  

There is no place in the universe where I am separated or disconnected from God.  How is this possible?  Because when God breathed himself into us, he put a part of himself in us.  We are always connected.  Our minds just don’t want to believe it.  So we spend our whole lives, living out this nightmare reality, where we think we are somehow separated from the OMNIPRESENT, omnipotent, omniscient God.  How can we be apart from “something” that is in every particle of the universe?  If God is ever-all-present, all-powerful, all-knowing, how is it that we think we can be lost from him?

So the Secret to Happiness is a misnomer.  Happiness is a fleeting, temporary feeling.  You might feel happy if things go the way you expect or want or think they should be.  You might be unhappy if things do not go your way.  Happiness is a temporary form, an illusion.  Happiness is dependent upon all your external desires falling into place.  Happiness tends live in the realm of past and future, rarely in the now, and even then it is short lived.  

But peace, contentment, joy, abundant life, BEING, wholeness—- these are formless, eternal, internal qualities which are a deeper part of us when we are in Christ, when we hush the mind-made self, when we accept what is in the now, and sense our deeper connection to the Creator of all.

Disclaimer:  These are my words and interpretations of both scriptures and the teachings of Tolle.  In no way should anyone assume that this is what Tolle says.  I suggest you read his books or listen to his teachings for yourself.  Please, find out for yourself if this resonates with you.  

Friday, August 28, 2020

Inner Peace now




Wow. It's Thursday morning here. I feel rested. And as I get ready to listen to my daily dose of Tolle, I am feeling really content. Peaceful and excited, too. I feel joy and gratitude welling up in me. I can't even explain why. I just do.

Well, we know why... I'm finally "getting" what Tolle has been saying for over 20-25 years. It's sinking deep into my spirit. And my spirit is finally waking up.   Yes, there are still thoughts and ideas, but this goes beyond words.  You can feel deep within your being, not just a new mental position or belief system or dogma.

I never really thought about death much. But now, I can honestly say that I am TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY at peace with death. I am not afraid of death. At all. I mean ALL FEAR IS GONE. I guess I never realized that, even as a Christian, I had been afraid of death. It didn't consume me, but I avoided the thought of it. Now, I am at peace.

Not that I plan on dying anytime soon, but I am at peace with death. I am at peace with this moment. I can feel a subtle shift occurring in me. And I feel it subtly changing my relationships. When I feel irritation over a tiny thing, I can catch myself almost immediately. Then, I stop and remind myself that what is...is. There is no use in complaining or grumbling. I accept what is. I don't have to be controlled by my thoughts or emotions or even my pain body and its triggers ever again. I can be at peace with what is in this moment. 

If you want to find out more, you can access The Power of Now for free on YouTube. Here's The Power of Now audio book on YouTube
https://youtu.be/kgqrLg-__9M

Tuesday, August 25, 2020

What does my ego look like?

 What does my ego look like?  

You can tell by things/ people/ ideas/ situations that I resist.  My ego likes to define itself as “right”, super intelligent, etc. Hint: if I am arguing, my ego is still operating.  If I am trying to prove that I am right, my ego is in control.  If I am trying to change someone else, or their minds, beliefs, or ideas, my ego is in charge, not the real me, the I am that I am.  If I am boasting or showing off about something I know or did or think I am (like how spiritual I think I am or self righteous), then I am completely given over to egoic self.  


The spirit part of me accepts what is now, including others’ disbelief or egos. Jesus died to self long before he went to the cross.  Jesus accepted suffering.  Sure, he had triggers for pain body like when he angrily threw out the money lenders from the temple.  The more I resist my family, my situation, my dislikes, the more unconscious I become.  Rather than becoming more spiritual, I continue to judge and be judged. 


A translation of the Indian greeting “Namaste” is the supreme lightness of being in me acknowledges the lightness of being in you. 

When I operate from the ego-self, I forget all about Namaste, that I am so much more than what I think, that others are so much more than what I see.  We are interconnected.  


What triggers my pain body? Pay attention to my emotions: anger, irritation, grievance, self-pity, judgments, rejection by family.  

This is why Jesus said if you don’t forgive, you won’t be forgiven.  What we do to others, we do to ourselves.  This is why he said to love our enemies. Why he said to live the golden rule.  Treat others the way you want to be treated.  We are not separate from each other.  We are each other.  We are part of the whole, the whole is in us and always has been.


If I want respect, I must respect.  If I want unconditional love, I must love expecting nothing in return.  If I want acceptance, I must accept without preconditions.  


Ego, as Tolle describes it, is our pre-existing mental patterns and those things we tell ourselves about who we think we are and what we think the world should be like.  It’s a list of likes and dislikes in our heads, judgments shaped by our history, cultural identity, family stories, family preferences, all conditioned as mental structures on which most of us spend our entire lives, never stopping to examine the deeper awareness that is our consciousness, the awareness of presence, which goes deeper and beyond words or ideas or thoughts.  So much of our lives are lived unconsciously, just programmed reactions to outward stimuli, things we like or don’t like, want or don’t want.  Not lived in the moment, but in rehashing the past or in some imagined future.


Fr. Richard Rohr’s book, The Universal Christ is eye-opening, spirit-awakening.



It made me think of e.e. Cummings’ poem:

                              "next to of course god america i"
                                                              
 
      

next to of course god america i
love you land of the pilgrims' and so forth oh
say can you see by the dawn's early my
country 'tis of centuries come and go
and are no more what of it we should worry
in every language even deafanddumb
thy sons acclaim your glorious name by gorry
by jingo by gee by gosh by gum
why talk of beauty what could be more beaut-
iful than these heroic happy dead
who rushed like lions to the roaring slaughter
they did not stop to think they died instead
then shall the voice of liberty be mute?
He spoke. And drank rapidly a glass of water

                By: E.E. Cummings

We see the ultimate outcome of unconscious living: war.  

I’m listening to Eckhart Tolle read “Stillness Speaks”. Oh, this…



I'm listening to Eckhart Tolle read "Stillness Speaks". Oh, this little book is so profoundly beautiful. Beautiful seems too small a word to point to the deeper reality that is hidden in us, in the moon, the cosmos, this rock upon which my physical body (form) is resting... I had to stop. Rewind. Replay the intro and chapter one again and again.

It's just so sweet. I feel the unending, eternal grace, divine presence, universal Christ presence, the divine sweetness and light, whatever you want to call it, as I listen to these opening words. It's like a call to return home, not a physical home or even home with our sadly dysfunctional, yet beautifully broken family home. It's like a call to our real home, home in the divine sweetness and light and creativity and joy that has always been in us and through us and in and through everything.


I'm listening to Mandisa in the morning now. Her lyrics start to get to the heart of this:
From Dance, Dance, Dance

"Maybe you don't understand why I gotta dance
There was something had me down but it's over now
I'm a throw my hands up
Wave 'em all in the air
'Cause all I wanna do is dance, dance, dance
They told me you ain't good enough
Don't look good enough
Don't sing good enough
Maybe you should give it up
And if I would've then I never could've received
None of the things that He planned for me
So I waited a little longer
Grew a little stronger and then
I realized something was happening
It's so incredible, it's unexplainable
You oughta try Him for yourself and see because
Maybe you don't understand why I gotta dance
There was something had me down but it's over now
I'm a throw my hands up
Wave 'em all in the air
'Cause all I wanna do is dance, dance, dance..."

With songs like True Beauty, What If We Were Real, The Definition of Me, Shine, Joy Unspeakable, Never Gonna Steal My Joy, Overcomer, What You're Worth, Stronger, Keep Getting Up, What Scars Are For, Free, and Good Morning, Mandisa's music appeals to the inner you. You can feel spirit awakening.




I am mountain

I am mountain

I am budding tree
I am crumbling rock,
Raging river,
Ebb and tide.

I am moon,
I am fading flower,
Eternal dance,
Ephemeral song.

I am spirit hovering over the deep.
I am form and formless.

I am Alpha and Omega,
Beginning and end and
All the nows in between
World without end.

One day this form will pass away, 
but who I am can never die.

I am the cosmos,
the stuff of stars.
I am life,
the universal Christ lives in me. 

I am created in God's image,
part of all creation,
yet never ending,
always existing.

I am that I am.
I am, but though I exist now in this limited body,
I am eternal.
I am connected to the whole of creation.

We are one.

I am the wind.
I am the red-tailed hawk upon the breeze.
I am the awareness.
I am peace, stillness, joy, love.

I am my brothers and sisters 
and mother and father.
I am my "enemy".
I am all and none.

I am the dash on my gravestone!
I am the space between 
those etched, but fleeting years.
Knowing this, I am free!

I am that I am, now.

I always am.

Selah.


Today's lesson: learning to accept what is and relinquishing "my" story. 

 What did I grumble about today? My sister worked in the yard. Yep, now that I say it out loud, I can see the absurdity of my ego railing against help.  

 Instead of rejoicing that she is participating in creation, I grumbled and complained and resisted what is. No acceptance. Instead, I filled my mind with judgments and imagined judgments from her. "I don't like the way the flower beds look, they are all chaotic, tangled, trashy." Instead of being happy that she was getting involved, I took offense. In my mind, I complained and defended myself and told myself over and over, with every snarky complaint from her, "Well, at least I TRIED to do something!" 

 I did not say it out loud, but I get why Jesus said, "If you say it or do it in your heart, you've already done it." I was defending my bruised ego all day, taking offense at everything she said, implied, or didn't say. "She didn't even thank me for spending hundreds of dollars every year on new plants and hours and hours planting them. Hmmmph!" See? I was totally identified with defending my sense of "self" or ego, instead of just accepting what is.

My whole day could have been different if I had just said to myself: "Hey, it's a good thing that she is participating. So what if she gripes about the way I did it? She can't help it anyway. She is unconscious. Not that I am superior. But I can accept what is. It is as it is. Complaining or grumbling will not change anything for the better. Stop seeing only her ego structures. Stop imprisoning your sister. Set her free by seeing the weight of glory in her. Let go of judgments against her, the situation, and me. Let it go. "

I can see now.
That anger was my pain body just reacting to a trigger which may or may not have been there. I have a choice moment by moment to settle for arguments, drama, ego v ego, and fighting against forms, or to live in my deepest presence now just letting go, accepting what is, and relishing the deep peace of inner self.

 And doing so, I set not only myself free, but I set my sister free from all my judgments against her.  I release her to be the divine presence that is her true self.  



Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Jesus and the ego self



In Lecture 6 from the Omega series: Tolle talks about presence as non-resistance to what is.  Jesus’ talk about turning the other cheek.  Turning the other cheek is exactly about this: not getting caught up in the drama of self-identity.  Not defending your ego.  It’s about being fully, deeply present now.  Letting go of the past and the future and accepting what is. 


Tolle points out that this does not mean that if someone is threatening your actual physical existence to just let them stab you, for example.  Being fully present may mean that I take evasive action, but I do it calmly without getting all caught up in some emotionally charged story about this moment.  I do not attack the other person out of a sense of self-identity preservation.  If I defend my body, I do that without the drama. I don’t turn the other person into my enemy in my mind.  And this is the critical piece of Jesus’ example: not making enemies in my mind of others.  See Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 6(?). 


Imagine Jesus before the Sanhedrin with all their accusations, violence and drama.  They were beside themselves with indignation, self-righteousness, blame, trying to guilt or shame him.  They were livid, furious. 


Yet, because Jesus was fully practiced in non-identification with egoic self or the form of ego, he said nothing.  Not a word in his defense.  


When Pilate questioned him and repeated the accusations, Jesus asked, “Is this what you say or are you just telling me what others say?” Pilate replies,”So, you are the King of the Jews?” And Jesus basically says, “That’s your story.”  Because Jesus is not defending his image, his sense of self, because he is deeply present in this moment, calm, not dragged into the drama, Pilate recognizes this and pleads with the people to let him go, “He has done nothing wrong.  I find no fault in him.  He certainly has done nothing to deserve death.”  


But when we are caught up in our egoic self, our sense of self-righteousness often takes over.  We spend so much time and energy trying to prove our “rightness” to the world. And when we are identified with constantly having to prove how right we are, we make enemies in our own minds out of everyone else.   We are no different than these Pharisees and Sadducees who made an enemy out of a Jesus.  Jesus was not their enemy.  But in their minds, he was the enemy.  And when we make someone else into an enemy, it becomes much easier to murder or kill that person and feel fully justified and righteous in doing so. This is the drama of the ego mind. 


See the previous entry on Cain and Abel.  

Friday, July 31, 2020

Dying to self



Jesus once asked "Who do you say that I am?"  Was he trying to boost his self-identity, his ego self?  When Peter declares "you are the son of God", Jesus says "yep!  That's it!"  He even goes on to say that heaven revealed this to Peter.  In other words, Jesus knew his true self. His eternal self.  Not the stories or lists of accomplishments or what the world tells us is who we are.  Even Peter got a brief glimpse of this eternity in the now, a glimpse of who Jesus really is. 

Jesus' friends came to him at one point to tell him that his mother and brothers had come to take him away.  
Where were they taking him? To an asylum? To his father's funeral?  Who knows? But it used to seem so harsh to me that he would respond with "who is my mother?  Who are my brothers? Only those who follow me are my brothers and sisters".  I think I'm beginning to understand (and this also is a mental process, possibly an illusion).... who we are inside is not defined by relationships. Dying to that concept of self "I'm the child of so-and-so.  I'm the sibling of such-and-such"... these are just labels which we tell ourselves are who we are, but I am that I am. Even this idea comes with a warning against dualism.  Though we are not defined by our relationships, at the same time, we are.  This is paradox.  It is and it is not, both.

Later, when he says, "I have not come to bring peace, but a sword", this takes on a whole new meaning.   If the sword is dividing our thought form from our spirit self, our ideas and mental patterns of "should and must" from the real us, the inner eternal us, then yes.  I can see that mother, brother, sister... all these labels and false histories and unreal concepts of "other" and "self" will be in conflict.  It takes practice (not time, because the only time that exists is now continually unfolding) to let go of our mental constructs and social constructs.  When I let go of every idea I have of who I am: past experiences, body, fears, mental ruts, possessions, relationships, religion, belief systems, words to describe me, everything I used to define myself, I am left with inner presence now.  As I let go of all those conceptions of self, I find freedom.  And this brings the peace that passes all understanding that will guard your hearts and your minds.  

When Jesus met Pilate, Pilate asked him "Are you the king of the Jews?  Are you guilty of everything I hear your religious leaders telling me?"  Jesus responds with "That's the story you tell yourself."  He does not defend himself.  Because he has already died to this sense of self long ago.  So murderous accusations fly... so what? Jesus knows who he is.  He knows that this human body with all its thoughts and emotions and constructs, even this world, the social structures, and the physical universe are only a temporary form.  The real Christ is formless, eternal, in all and through all, without him nothing was made that was made, the entire universe is suspended and held together in his being.  
  
Jesus dying on the cross understood this, that even when terrible things happen, something greater in us arises.  Being in the power of this moment, he is able to say, "Father, forgive them.  They don't understand. Don't hold this against them" (this was probably more for the humans standing around the cross). This is the something greater, infinitely vaster than that which only appears temporarily in the moment, the form — the disaster. ...- Tolle 

John the Baptist got this, too.  He said, I must decrease and he must increase.   He knew what dying to self meant. John recognizes the real self and "dies" to the Ego self.  So even though John was also facing imminent death, he also understood this incredible peace.  If he had been still attached to his ego-self, he would have railed against the injustice being done to him.  He would have rallied his supporters and denounced Herod and his wickedness.  And when John's disciples came to him to ask about this upstart Jesus (who does he think he is anyway?), John did not try to cling to his disciples and say, "Don't follow him.  Stay with me.  Only I have insight."  No, he said, "I must decrease so that he may increase. My time is up.  I'm letting go. I'm at peace with what is."

John the Baptist knew this Deep Silence, stillness amid chaos, noise, distraction.  You can hear the silence in the midst of chaos. Psalm 46:10.  This is the peace that passes all understanding, that fills you up.  You sense it.  You know it is in you and is greater than you, greater than your body, greater than your mind.  You know it is there.  

Jesus said to seek the kingdom first, then what you need will come, too.  He also said, If someone tells you, 'Oh, Jesus is over here or over there or on this mountain.'  Don't go looking for me.  I'm not there.  When I come, you will know it."  He said the Holy Spirit would be with us, comfort us, and guide us into all truth.  He is in us.  The eternal one is here now.  You don't have to go looking for him.  He is with the broken hearted.  When you tire of your false self, he is here now. 


This is why The Lord's Prayer makes sense now. 

  • Our father in heaven —- God is not in some other place .  Jesus pointed this out in John 4.  God is in you.  The kingdom of heaven is near, in you, now. 
  • Hallowed be your name.  What name?  The I am that I am.  Names just point us in the right direction...
  • Thy kingdom come (now). Thy will be done (now) on earth as it is in heaven.  This is a surrender to what is, not a giving up.  It’s not a "Oh I can never change this situation."  It's a, "Yes to you in me now".  I surrender in this moment.  
  • Give us today, this moment, our daily bread, what we need.  This is not about the future.  The story of the Israelites wandering in the desert and getting manna on a daily basis is a perfect example of this.  No one was to hoard more for later.  It had to be gathered daily or else it began to rot. Manna was another great example of this kind of provision which cannot be named.  In fact, "manna" means "what is it?".  Now is the only time.  The past does not exist anymore.  The future never comes, except as this moment, now, continuously unfolding.
  • Forgive us as we forgive others... as we let go of all judgments against ourselves and others.  We are one.  We are interconnected.  All of life flows in us.  We are not separate from “others.”  So we love, forgive others, treat others as ourselves.  What we do to others, we do to ourselves. 
  • and lead us not into temptation... the temptation of seeing others as objects or the stories and opinions I have about them.  The temptation to see myself as only my thoughts or emotions, and not the real inner presence that is me.
  • But deliver us right now from evil— if my negative thoughts and constructs limit me, how much more do I imprison others with my ideas about them? Help me to accept what is and not label it: good or evil.  But surrender in this moment to what is.  
  • For yours is the kingdom (the infinite), and the power (of being), and the glory (the incredible vastness of light and love) forever (now infinitely unfolding).   Amen.

Monday, July 27, 2020

Jesus and the Tao (6)

Judge not (get out of your head, thoughts), lest you be judged. This statement deals specifically with our thought self, the stories and narratives which run continually in our minds about others.  See Matthew 7.   Want to know what Jesus really thought, how he lived?  Re-read Matthew chapters 4-7.  When we let go of this egoic self, life takes on a whole new meaning.


Jesus also said, “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light”. What does that even mean? Why? When we let go of our “thought self”, we don’t have to be driven by this false sense of self which our minds construct about not only us but also others.  We are not what we think.  “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he” is true only on the level of false construction.  


But who we are is light, not heavy.  Do you feel heavy, burdened down? Let go of your egoic self. Letting go of these fake identities or distractions and illusions is liberating.  This is real freedom!  Tolle talks about these constructs or forms (made up in our thoughts) as being like massive steam engines on the Titanic.  Massive, enormous, space consuming, HUGE, powerful engines which do NOT stop on a dime.  There is momentum when people are so identified with their ego-self, that is their ideas of who they think they are and who they think others are.  They will chug right at you, hoping to pull you into their wake with powerful emotional energy or to feed on your pain energy.  This egoic self is destructive to myself and others.  


Sure, at times, my ego feels temporarily satisfied, but watch how quickly it turns into desire (a future want or don’t want or projection) or regret (focus on the no-longer existent past). The terrible thing is that this emotional energy which is all tied with these fictitious stories about myself and others is destructive and all-consuming.  Once these engines have fired up, there is little to stop them. They perpetuate themselves, feeding on pain energy from self and others, like those Titanic engines heading toward the hidden iceberg.  “And you know what happened to the Titanic,” he quips (See the Omega retreat 2001).  


The good news is that we don’t have to stay in that heaviness anymore, the heaviness of those mental engines.  By practice of presence now, by staying in this moment, we can be free. 


Tolle says to practice presence with nature first: a tree, a rock, a flower.   It’s easier than people. It takes a lot more presence to deal with people and not get sucked into their thought engines, their stories.   Jesus said, “consider the lilies of the field how they neither toil nor spin.”  So, today, I’m contemplating a tree.  Just accepting what is.  Not judging it or trying to make it fit into some grand design or plan or end goal.   Just observing.  And when I focus on right now, I’m less consumed with worries about what will happen later or what happened in the past.  

Saturday, July 25, 2020

Form and formless: the shape of water

Form and formless

Even in the Old Testament, we see numerous examples of God showing us that forms are only temporary pointers to the formless. I was dreaming about this last night. In my dream, I was reminded that when Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt, people began to grumble and complain, asking, "Why are we following this madman Moses out into the desert? We are going to die. Slavery was better than this..." So God appeared to them in a formless form, right? He appeared as a Cloud of Smoke by day and a Pillar of Fire by night. Interesting that God chose a shifting, ethereal form which could not be held or sculpted, eh? Even then, the people still wanted a solid form to worship. They made the golden calf with the help of Aaron. It's such a human mindset, isn't it, to want to cling to something external to feel content?

I also dreamed about the story of Jacob (later named Israel) and his twin brother Esau. In the story, Jacob convinces Esau to give up his birthright. And Esau readily consents. Why? And why was Esau then furious later when Jacob tricked his father into giving his blessing to him instead of Esau? I never understood this weird dynamic before. Why was Jacob, a deceiver and manipulator, considered the hero of this story?

 Not that I condone lying and manipulation, but I think I'm beginning to understand...maybe. It's not so much a story about Jacob as it is a cautionary tale about Esau. Esau was so caught up in his own head, his "identity" as a mighty hunter, his thought patterns. So he goes out hunting for big game for days on end, alone. Esau has hung his whole identity on this image of himself and others' image of him as a great hunter, the guy who is capable of taking care of business, the guy who gets things done, the winner, the big, good-looking athlete. We know from the story that he is hot tempered, easily angered, complaining. And when he fails at his task, his self image is shattered. He comes home, really hungry, and finds his little twin cooking with momma. Jacob has a pot of lentils. When Jacob says that he'll trade the food for Esau's birthright, Esau readily agrees. It had to be a joke, right? Just sibling rivalry? But this rivalry went deep. And Esau’s fatal flaw, so to speak, is that he glibbly trades the intangible glory of "birthright" for a pot of beans. Here is where the verse "Man does not live on bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God" comes into play. Esau only looked to the external forms to sustain him, to satisfy him. He readily gave up the intangible for something external and tangible. He traded eternal glory for something temporary. He later regrets that choice, but according to their own traditions, what's done is done, no take-backs.

I dreamed also about Cain and Abel, another sibling rivalry, at least it was in Cain's head. In this story, too, one brother is content, serving at home, doing what he does with joy, while the other is caught up in the blame/shame/complain game in his own head. The "rule" or directive was that they should bring the first fruits (the best of the best, too) as a sacrifice to God. It was even supposed to be a perfect lamb. Abel wasn't into animal husbandry but into growing fruits and veg. And he gave joyfully of the best of the first fruits to God, the immortal, invisible one. Cain raised the sheep. But he didn't see the point in giving a perfectly good lamb to an invisible God. He grumbled and complained and fussed and got angrier every time his mind dwelled on it. He festered in his mind. Why should I give up something perfectly good? Why not give the lamb who is lame or stillborn? Who will know? I'm not giving up MY hard work for nothing!

Abel went about with joy, gladly giving the best as a sacrifice, while Cain grumbled and gave the least that he could. And when the day came that God accepted Abel's vegetarian sacrifice over Cain's stingy "meat" sacrifice (which technically was supposed to be the proper sacrifice), Cain lost it. He became completely unhinged. So lost in his thought patterns of complaining and making excuses for himself and trying to prove himself "in the right" that he decided in his heart to kill his brother. Of course! That's the only solution when you are caught up in the form of your thought patterns! Because changing an external, i.e., getting rid of your brother, is the logical solution to an internal problem, right? So, rather than deal with his internal issues by removing his attachments to the self-identity or the egoic self, he removed his brother...permanently.  Murder.  He was so consumed by his thoughts of jealousy and rage and his sense of offense (totally imagined according to the story), that he killed his brother, rather than deal with his own heart problem, the disease of his rotting soul.  Epic fail!

This is where the forms, or our inordinate dependence upon forms, fails us.  It is the great disconnect that we often speak of in sustainability.  The great disconnect occurs when we rely upon externals to try to fix what is essentially an internal or spiritual problem.  

This is not a type of gnosticism which says that only spiritual things are good and all material things or physical things are bad.  Again, the forms which are sometimes physical are there to point us in the right direction and indeed are a part of our identity, too.  But forms are only temporary pointing to the eternal formless one in us.  They are intrinsically tied together, but at the same time, the form is not the formless.  It is and it is not at the same time.  This is the paradox.  It is like trying to describe the shape of water.  If water is in my pool, you could say that water is the shape of my pool.  It conforms to the form it is in.  But at the same time, water is formless in its liquid or gas states.  The formless cannot be described only by the form it is in.  In the same way, my identity form (whether body or thought patterns and emotions) “holds” the formless (spirit) in me, and is a part of me, but at the same time, the eternal formless part of me cannot be described by my body or my ego identity.  This is the paradox of the form and the formless, like the shape of water.


Monday, July 20, 2020

The Buddha, The Tao, & Jesus


Here is a simple comparison of what the three have said about wealth, greed, or treasure. 

 Jesus: “Do not store up for yourselves treasure on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal; but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves do not break in and steal.” 

Buddha: “Let the wise man do righteousness: A treasure that others cannot share, which no thief can steal; a treasure which does not pass away.”  The Buddha preceded Christ by almost 500 years, passing away around the year 483 BCE. 

The Tao Te Ching says (Chp 81), “The sage does not hoard. The more he does for others, the more he has. The more he thereby gives to others, the ever more he gets”.  The Tao was written about 300 years before Christ. 

Saturday, July 18, 2020

Form and formless -Jesus and the Tao (part 4)

Today, I’m pondering this idea of forms and the formless.... this is why in the OT, God commanded that the people of Israel make no “graven image”.... do not make an idol out of a thing, a form. 
 Forms may point us in the right direction, but they should point us to the Eternal One, the formless, the Great I am.  Forms, like names,  may point us toward the God, like Jehovah Jireh, god my provider, but God is not only my provider.  That’s why there are hundreds if not thousands of names for God.  God is not the name.  

If I cling only to one name for God, I end up making a cult out of it, to the exclusion of other names or forms.  I cling to the form, rather than the formless.  

If I make an idol out of a certain teacher or guru or pastor, and I say to myself, “Only this teacher  has ‘real’ insight, everyone else is on the wrong track...” I have made an idol out of a form.  The teacher may point me to God, but the teacher is not God. 

If I say to myself, “my religion, my sect, or my denomination, my culture, my nation, my people, my political party are the only ones who really seek truth or are the only ones who follow truth”, then I have taken a potentially good thing like that denomination or group and I have turned that form into an idol.  

God wasn’t saying, “never carve anything or paint an image”.  He was saying that “forms can point you toward me, but do not worship the temporary form.” 

Though my Christian family members do not understand, this is how I can have a statue of a Buddha or Madonna and child or crucifix and NOT BE TEMPTED TO WORSHIP IT, at all.  The Buddha statue may remind me to focus on inner peace when I look at it.  The statue itself does not bring me peace.  That does not mean that I worship it or look to it to be my god.   

The antique Madonna and Child music box, a simple tool for reminding me to take a moment to meditate, is not my god.  I do not worship it simply because it is currently in my possession.  This Spezialgeschaft fur devotionalien is not my god.  Just because I look at or keep it around does not mean I worship the Virgin Mary holding Baby Jesus.


In the same way, having a crucifix does not mean I worship the cross or that I pray to the cross. No, it is simply a form that may remind me of the formless, eternal One.  

The Tao Te Ching states, “Clay is formed into a vessel.  It is because of its emptiness that the vessel is useful....Therefore, what is present is used for profit.  But it is in absence that there is usefulness” (chp 11).  The form is only a vessel.  It is the formless which we seek. 

We are eternal, formless beings in a physical body (which is just a form) and with mind patterns and thoughts (also just a form).  If I capture fog or mist in a bottle, do you say, “Aha!  The mist is the bottle. Or the mist looks like the vessel it is in”? The mist is not the bottle, yet we believe our bodies to be our true identity.  At the same time, the form of our body is also a part of us.  It is temporary. The stories we cling to are also a kind of bottle.  We take great hope or wallow in despair, depending on how we see ourselves, how we perceive this bottle.  Yet, the thoughts and words are also part of us.  They are not us. They are a form for the formless. Forms do not last forever.


  2 Corinthians reflects the teaching of the Tao above: we hold this treasure, this mystery, this glory in jars of clay, to show that this all-surpassing glory is not from us (the projected mind-body image) but from God (the eternal who is in us).  


2 Corinthians 4-  “Therefore, since through God’s mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart. Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God. And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing. The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. 7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. 12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.13 It is written: “I believed; therefore I have spoken.” Since we have that same spirit of faith, we also believe and therefore speak, 14 because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you to himself. 15 All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. 16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 


This is the good news.  We have forms which point us to the formless.  But we do not fixate on the forms, they are only temporary.  And when we recognize the eternal one living in us, we have peace. We can accept with grace any situation that arises, because we are no longer attached to the old self or the outward forms.  

Can you capture the vastness of the sky in a bottle?  No more can you capture the formless, infinite, eternal one in a temporary, finite form.  Can you catch the sky and put it in a bottle?  It is vast. Infinitely vast.  Without end.  Jesus talked to Nicodemus.  What is spirit? Can you catch the wind?  

I think a better interpretation would be “can you catch it, hold on to it, name it, tame it, make it your property, put it in a vessel and store it?”  You may try.  It might even work temporarily, partially.  But you cannot hold on to it or make it yours.  As soon as we say, “Aha! I’ve got it.  I understand spirit”, it slips from our grasp.  

Our minds, words, thoughts, belief systems, and bodies are forms or vessels for the formless. They are not the formless.  They can point us in the right direction, but they cannot “hold on to it” or truly contain it. It’s like trying to fit the entire sky into a little glass jar.  You can capture some air and seal it in, but as soon as you do that, it is no longer the infinite vastness of sky.  It may be a part of it, but the infinite cannot be contained forever in the finite.